How To Build Rapport In An Instant
No matter who you are or what you do, the ability to create rapport with people is an essential skill. Everything we do in life that involves people requires that we build rapport in order to create a connection and achieve positive results. If you aren’t able to effectively use this skill, you’re going to really struggle when it comes to making friends, managing people, and building strong relationships. Here are 4 keys to mastering the art of rapport building:
Step 1 – Look in the Mirror
You may wonder what looking in the mirror has to do with building rapport. It’s actually the most powerful tool when it comes to connecting with someone. Most people try to utilize the spoken word to create rapport, but in reality, words represent only about 7% of your ability to connect with someone. How you move your body (55%), and the volume, tempo, and tonality of your voice (38%), are actually much more impactful when it comes to creating rapport.
So, the best way to create instant rapport with someone is to imagine that you are a mirror, and mirror exactly what they do with their body (their posture, facial expressions, and gestures), their voice (volume, tempo, and tonality), as well as the key words they are using. Doing this creates an instant, subconscious bond between you and the other person, and is the quickest way to create rapport.
Step 2 – Ask Great Questions
People love to talk about themselves, and the best way to get someone else talking is to ask them great questions! When you take an interest in someone and ask them great questions and listen to what they have to say, a couple of things immediately happen:
- They are talking about themselves (everyone loves this)
- You are getting to know all sorts of things about them, which will enable you to connect with them at a deeper level
By asking great questions, you can quickly determine what motivates someone, what your common interests are, what’s interesting about them, and a whole bunch of things that will help you create more rapport with them.
Step 3 – Find Something in Common
People like people that have things in common with them. The more you have in common, the more you tend to connect! So, by honing in on something you have in common right away, you can create a quick connection and instant rapport.
Step 4 – Connect First, Then Lead
Once you feel that you’ve created a strong connection with someone, it’s time to lead. After you’ve mirrored them for a while, start to change to your actual style (how you move your body, speak, and the words that you use), and, if you’ve created rapport, they will follow you. You’ll notice their body movements, language and pace starting to mirror yours when this happens. At that point, you know you have rapport with them!
This is also a good test to see if you have rapport, and how much rapport you have. If the other person doesn’t follow your lead, then you need to go back to mirroring and connecting with them until you’ve built up enough rapport for them to follow your lead.
By following these 4 steps, you’ll be able to build connection and rapport in an instant, with anyone you want to. I encourage you to have fun trying them out, and reap the benefits of being a master connector and rapport builder.
Enjoy!