The More You Believe You Need Something, The Less You Will Have It!

Have you ever noticed that the more you seem to need something, the less likely you are to get it? This applies to anything and everything from making a sale, to getting a date. The more needy we are, the more likely it is that we won't get what it is we are after. Ever hear the familiar saying, "you will meet your wife/husband when you are not looking for it?" Profound wisdom!

You see, nobody buys needs. Needs create pressure, stress, strain, and nervousness. Not only for the other person, but for you as well. Just think about the last time you bought a used car. As you walked into the showroom, the doors locked behind you, the salesman came out, and you got that sinking feeling in your gut that you aren't leaving until you buy something! Fun, huh?

I know what you are thinking...what about when I really do need something? How about that sale to end your three month sales drought? How about that job you need to pay your bills? While these are valid concerns, being needy is not going to help you, but rather hinder you from getting what you want. So, next time you feel the stress of needing something, follow these tips:

1. Realize that it is not a need, just a preference

This small distinction can go a long way. When you reframe your need into just a preference, it takes all the pressure off.

2. Detach from the outcome

If you don't care what the outcome is, then your need to control the situation disappears. Now you can focus on the process of doing what you need to do to get where you want, rather than focusing on the outcome. If you are focusing on the end result, you divert your energy away from where it should be, which is the process.

3. Get your needs met in another way

Is there some other way to get your need met? In my experience, there always is. Sometimes letting go of the path we take to get somewhere is exactly what we need to do to get the result we want!

4. Ask yourself what is really going on

Why are you so attached to your need? Oftentimes, the answer to this question will help us to see what is really going on.

The next time you feel your needs taking over, think about the above tips, and set yourself free!